I have an observation/theory:
If we try to get into the head of a female rape victim – perhaps one who has had it really bad – not only was she victim blamed afterwards, but also wasn’t believed by the police and ended up with PTSD from the act – we could see her asking herself “Why did this happen to me? What kind of world do we live in where this could happen?”
It’s not hard to imagine her looking for support – and getting it within Feminism. Feminism replies “You were raped because of rape culture.”
Suddenly her questions have answers that are wrapped up in a neat little package. Her rapist, long ago escaped, is not something she can fight – an ideology IS something she can fight with her fellow female rape victims. It’s part of her healing process. “Rape culture” becomes a surrogate for her rapist – something that she kick and punch and fight and feel like she’s making progress and justice is being done.
The problem is that male rape victims don’t fit into rape culture. It breaks the story, the very existence of male victims and female perpetrators cuts the strings that tie together the neat little package of “rape culture.”
So every time you point out that male victims exist, you’re saying that their punches and kicks towards their surrogate rapist (rape culture) are only hitting air. You’re taking away their only form of vengeance and putting them back into that box of powerlessness where they live in a world with no explanation why bad things happen.”