Let me first say that I honestly see the validity of feminism, I really do. Many of you have gone insane, but somewhere buried in the ravenous culture-destroying sandstorm of your discontent lies the simple validity of your movement. Feminism is merely an expression of post-industrial female humanity that seeks to free itself from male authority. I get that. My grandmother was a feminist and a wonderful lady. What many contemporary feminists don’t seem to appreciate is that there is a flip side to this coin. With authority comes obligation, and the validity of the MHRM is that it seeks to free post-industrial male humanity from obligation to women.
Both of these post-industrial egalitarian goals, freeing women from male authority and freeing men from female obligation, could easily have coexisted under the same roof. Instead, for the past 50 years feminism has insisted on making the discussion one entirely about male authority. Those people intelligent enough to see this are now mostly pissed off about it, and attempting to convince us that misandry doesn’t exist or that women are de facto oppressed will no longer work. Many men and women see an unfair and ever-expanding unhealthy male obligation to women in our culture.
Unfortunately for everyone, you insist on understanding and processing everything in terms of male authority. You see our movement in terms of male authority, and you thus miss the point entirely. This movement is about male obligation. We support your equality, we simply want to be freed from our obligations to you, which is why we often ask some of you to please grow up. Many of you apparently believe the MHRM is somehow trying to reassert male authority. This could not be further from the truth. In fact, judging from the rapid growth of MGTOW philosophy, it’s probably more accurate to say that many men in our culture are fed up and want out altogether.
Whether men are even in a position of authority anymore is debatable, but ignoring that, let’s agree to define pre-feminist Western culture as “patriarchy.” I don’t think anyone can deny that the last century of feminist activism has worked only to free women from male authority, and has even fought to keep men bound to their obligations to women. Female patriarchal roles have been discarded, while male patriarchal roles have been entrenched. In other words, feminists have selectively supported one half of the patriarchy while attacking the other, even while claiming universal opposition to the patriarchy.
Thus, patriarchy doesn’t hurt men, the current scenario of double standards that have been put into place by 50 years of unopposed feminist activism hurts men. Stated more generally, feminism hurts men. Most men in the manosphere have done this math and come to this conclusion. So trying to convince us that “patriarchy hurts men” just won’t cut it anymore.
And even if this were the patriarchy hurting men as you claim, why should this notion stop men from attempting to free ourselves from it? Why should such a notion compel men to be feminists instead of fighting on our own behalf? At best, the whole discussion on patriarchy is a semantic one, which doesn’t change our condition or our efforts. At worst, the word patriarchy is a weapon; a distortion meant to validate your ideology and deny the legitimacy of men’s views. This, by the way, is starting to piss men off.
And indeed pissing men off has become feminism’s bread and butter. The expansion of anti male legislation is as common as it is unbelievable. I sometimes believe feminism has become the dominant force driving the expansion of misogyny in Western culture. This alone is enough to validate opposition to it. But more than this, your fight to free yourself from any semblance of male authority, real or imagined, is now infringing on our human rights as men. And when we attempt to discuss how our human rights are being violated, you even attempt to silence us by rolling over other fundamental human rights. This is why many of us laugh so heartily when you claim to fight for men’s rights.
The next time someone says that MRAs think only men are oppressed and feminism is entirely unneeded, please point them to the first paragraph of this excerpt.
I don’t think it was appropriate to compare Adria Richards to a “adult-shaped Disney Princess”, however. Tiana, Rapunzel and Merida would’ve had no problem calling her out. Or, for that matter, Belle, or Mulan, or Ariel (“What’s a dongle?”)
Good points in the rest of the article.